Entry #11

There has been a lot to do since last post. Yesterday I went to Gävle to meet up with my mom for a meeting she had that I was going to be part of, as support and also since I was the one that wanted her to go to this meeting. It actually went really well as far as I can understand and the lady we met really seemed to think that this was a good idea. It feels nice because I want to help my mom out but her current predicament is too much for me to “fix” and there must be a way to get help. So, that’s what I did. I feel that mom did appreciate that I was there. I could see at some points that she was getting really anxious and worrying about what was happening, but after asking a few more questions to the lady and having her repeat a few things so we really knew we all where on the same page, I could see that mom was calming down. Sure. I can understand that she is a bit worried of how things are going right now but I really want her to retire and not have to worry about this anymore. And if everything goes as planned then she will be able to retire a few years earlier than what she thought and go home to the Philippines if she wants to. I am being a bit vague about this because I don’t feel that this needs to be out there. It’s nice to see that she feels calmer about this whole situation and that’s really good, because then my older brother will calm down as well and hopefully, they’ll get on better terms. It’ll be a few tough years ahead but it’s way shorter than it otherwise would’ve been.

Jocke and I went to look at a house today and we both really liked it. Sure, it’s not perfect. For me it was mainly that there were a lot of small rooms everywhere instead of bigger and more open spaces. But that can be changed later on. The kitchen, bathroom and outside of the house were already renovated and that’s really great. We both decided that we wanted this house and we’re going to talk with the bank next week to see if we can get a loan. It was really nice and I felt calm at that place so I do hope we get it. But first we need to know if we can even get a loan to pay for it. I know that me being unemployed isn’t to our benefit but I hope that since we’re two and I don’t have any past history of taking loans before might be a positive thing. Also, compared to Gävle, the houses and apartments here aren’t nearly as expensive so we don’t have to loan that much. It’s still a lot of money but not an impossible amount.

I also sent the newest sketch I made to the tattoo artist. He really liked it and as far as I can understand from his message he feels that I’ve showed him that I’m good at drawing realistic things. So, now he wants me to try and focus on doing something that I want, but that would fit on the underside of ones forearm. He want’s to see what I can come up with on my own. This makes me really happy and I have to show him that I’ve listened to what he’s told me before. I already know that my line-work is extremely thin and it’s just not possible to translate that over on skin with a needle, AND have it look as good as on paper. I also need to think about the contrast that he’s had me focus on since the way I shadow also won’t work in tattoos. I have a few ideas that I’m tossing around in my head and I’m going to sketch some out, while also looking at some images online to see what works on a forearm. I’m guessing that it need to me longer instead of wider since the arm isn’t very wide. Well, mine isn’t and that’s what I need to go after since that’s what I always have with me. Makes it easier.

I feel hopeful about the future.

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